It takes a positive attitude to create a positive outcome. Your attitude determines the state of the world you live in. It is the foundation for every success and every failure you have had and will have. It will make you or break you. In simple terms, what you think is what you can expect to get from life.
But Why Do We Complain So Much As We Get Older?
We all complain, it just seems that as we get older we complain more. We complain about our health, we complain about the kids, the wife, work, our bank balance and hey heck, we complain about anything.
Sure, there are some individuals, who are particularly well evolved, who aren’t complainers, but most of us are.
How many of you have watched the film “Grumpy Old Men”?
John Gustafson (Jack Lemmon) and Max Goldman (Walter Matthau) are two curmudgeonly neighbours who have been at each other’s throats for years. The rivalry of the former friends intensifies when Ariel (Ann-Margret) comes along and provides a love interest for both of them. When Max finds out that John is experiencing family troubles and financial ruin, however, he steps in to help. Their bond is further cemented when John has a health scare and Max makes the ultimate sacrifice for his friend.
We All Have A God Given Right To Complain. But It Will Cost You.
I was a complainer and a moaner, I would always find fault in any situation. True, as we get older we all complain, but for some unknown reason, men have taken it to a different level. We have become experts in finding faults in almost all parts of our lives.
Some people refer to it as a midlife crisis, we hit 50 and the bottom just drops out of your lives and we moan and complain about just anything we can think about.
But complaining every day will cost you in the long run.
- Your personal relationships would eventually suffer if you continue to constantly suck the energy out of every room with complaining.
- Your professional career will eventually stall out if you constantly repel the people who you work with by complaining instead of taking action
- Your mental, emotional, and even physical health will eventually decline if you don’t make a decision to stop complaining and wallowing in negativity every day
Try To Enjoy Life Rather Than keep Finding Faults.
Here’s the hard truth. When you are the one who constantly complains about how bad you have it and how horrible life is and has been to you, it’s time for a change! You need to develop a positive attitude towards life. Put yourself in someone’s else’s shoes and see how you feel-
For example, constantly complaining about the service in a restaurant is not helpful. You don’t know what kind of a day your waiter or waitress has had or what problems are going on behind the scenes. If you put yourself in their shoes for a minute, you may be more kind and relax about the situation.
Your family and people around you and people who don’t know you think you are cold, rude and insensitive. And people who love you are simply tolerating you or perhaps have even stopped listening. Point blank… it’s most likely difficult to spend large amounts of time with you.
Over time we become – “Why Me” Why do things always go wrong? It becomes depressing, it’s like a broken record. – Turn it around change your mindset. Add one word to Why Me – Why NOT Me.
No matter who you are you can always learn new things in life. It’s about having an open mind, learn from life and your mistakes. So until you open yourself up to the possibilities, you will always stay stuck in that victim role.
We all become more intolerant of life as we get older, its human nature. But what’s the point in being a person that just keeps on complaining? Don’t complain about something without taking action.
If you are feed up with your life, change it. Don’t just find a reason to complain fix it.
Cast your mind back to when you were in your late twenties and early thirties, life seemed to be so much simpler, true as we get older we inherit more responsibilities, families, jobs, debt and so on.
But I look the younger generation today and think……. “I never was like that was I”? And then I ask my self would I swap, to be 35 again… No, because my life has been created by me, my thoughts my actions. I can’t turn back the clock and I certainly can’t blame anyone else.
If you find yourself constantly complaining you must believe you have a real need to complain and your life isn’t where you would like it to be. If you don’t complain, you probably know someone who does and it makes everyone feel uncomfortable.
They probably try to avoid that person as much as possible. Whether it’s you or someone else who is constantly complaining, what can be done to correct it and get back to positive living?
Frank Jennings – A Spark Starts
One of the greatest techniques I have used to reduce the level of my complaining is understood that someone has it much worse than myself. No matter how unfair life may seem, I have food to eat, clothes to wear and a place to live. With all of that, I don’t think I have the right to complain.
If something is bothering you, either fix it or accept that nothing can be done right now, so why complain? Complaining is a passive activity. Change that complaining into action to solve the problem or simply accept it and give your mind something else to focus on.
We All Like a Good Moan. Blowing Off Steam Is a Good Thing.
There is a big difference between blowing off steam and a continuous complainer. A habit, whether good or bad, is an urge to adopt that action no matter what the consequences. The more you feed the habit the more it will take control of your life and the harder it is to kick.
Complaining typically stems from negative thoughts you’ve created. You realize you’re the cause of your thoughts so you blame yourself and vent it with complaining.
Refuse to let those negative thoughts become you. We become what we think just like we become what we eat, drink or do.
If we put good into our body and mind then good will come out. Conversely, if we put bad things into our body and mind such as drugs and negative thoughts then bad will come out. It’s inevitable and it’s up to you to correct. Negative thinking and complaining can be just as addictive as a drug. Whatever your mind is used to thinking that’s what it craves.
Admit you have negative thoughts and that you are their creator. Realize too that these thoughts lead only to more negativity and more addiction. You know what you’re doing but can’t help yourself until you admit to your problem and let it go.
Relax and let your negative thoughts disappear. It may take a while but it can be done and when negative thinking is stopped so will your complaining. You didn’t become what you are overnight and you can’t expect to become what you desire overnight either. If that were the case we would all be perfect in mind and body. It’s a fight that can be won with constant dedication and awareness.
Don’t Doubt Yourself. Believe in Yourself.
We choose what we think and we choose what we are and can become. Accept responsibility for your actions and let it go. Then take positive steps to accept what needs to be done to achieve your goal. Dedicate yourself to getting it done.
Tame Your Inner Critic.
- Your “inner critic” can hurt your progress in building a positive attitude.
For example, perhaps your inner critic called you a dummy for spilling coffee on your boss. Your inner critic puts you down all the time and is nasty to you. Reflect on the times your inner critic says things like this. You will gain more insight into the times and situations when your inner critic comes out.
- Also, you can start to challenge the inner critic and other negative ways of thinking. This is an important part of building a positive attitude.
This will disrupt your mind’s pattern of thinking and it will be easy to fall back into the old ways. Surround yourself with positive things and these will seep into your mind until they become you and your new habit is formed. Whatever was bad in your environment that caused you to complain get rid of it. Each step toward a positive emotion gives you the confidence to continue.
We all tend to blame others. Only politicians can do that and get away with it. If you don’t like the life your living or the thoughts you’re thinking then change it. Take responsibility and take control. Stop complaining today and discover a new you tomorrow.