So how do you portray yourself? Oscar Wilde once said with his usual wit: Be yourself; everyone else is already taken. As humorous as this might seem, it’s a basic summation of the truth about how you portray yourself in the real world.
Yet, you can’t be yourself if you don’t know, understand, and accept yourself first. It should be your primary goal to find this out. Find yourself and define yourself on your terms.
What Do You Tell People About Yourself?
Have you ever thought about you portray yourself and how what you say about yourself transmits intimate knowledge to others? Do you say things like, “I never get anything done” or “I’m so disappointed with my career” or “I wish I was a better parent?”
Think about it like this, it is not changing a part of you, but being true to yourself. You would be the best version of you, and the people who love and care about you the most should accept you for who you are. Have confidence in yourself, it is the best thing you can do.
If you take me for example. From the outside, I look and sound like a very confident person, always willing to help others and see life as very much “half full”.
But if you were to turn me inside out you would see a completely different person.
Firstly, I suffer from hypertension which is a sign that I worry a lot, which is true. Deep down I am a little insecure and more introvert than extrovert. And I really do need to know what people really think of me, for example at work I am always looking for feedback, just to give a bit of a “pep up.”
I know its a bit stupid to be asking for praise and reassurance all the time, but that’s my nature. It goes back to my early childhood, which is a very long story for another day.
But it hasn’t stopped me from starting this blog. It’s my way of showing to myself as well as others that anything is possible if you have the right mindset and that the face you share with the world at large is true to your strengths and core values.
You to can overcome all your insecurities, fears and thoughts. One life- live it – no regrets.
Ponder these points to enhance your self-image as well as how others see you:
What kind of person are you? How would you describe yourself?
List your positive personal qualities. What are the very best things about you? Spend some time looking at your actions.
- Maybe you consider the needs of others over your own.
- Perhaps you’re a very giving person.
- You might see yourself as patient, kind, confident, or “devil-may-care.”
- You could be a pioneer of sorts—you’re never afraid to try something new.
- Are you an “idea” person at work where others look to you to problem-solve a situation?
What are your motives related to your personal choices? Why do you think it’s important to you? Ponder what motivates you to complete a task, stay in shape, and whatever else you came up with related to your positive qualities.
Which kind of remarks about yourself do you usually make: positive or negative? If you tend to put yourself down, what compels you to do so? Are you trying to be humble? Do you encourage others to have a negative picture of you?
List the negative comments you make to others about yourself. Include all of them—“I’m so fat” or “I can’t seem to find time to clean the house” or “Nobody at work ever notices what I do.” For each comment, allow time to jot down specifically why you believe you say these things.
- For example, for the “I’m so fat” comment, rather than saying “Because I am” as your reason why you say it, troubleshoot the situation. What specifically makes you feel you’re fat?
- Your reasoning could look something like, “Because I’m 20 pounds overweight, according to the weight charts” or “because I’m wearing a size 38 pants instead of 34 like I used to wear.”
- The goal here is to determine the underlying reasons you make these statements. By becoming aware of your reasons, you’ll put yourself on the path to raising your opinion of yourself.
Do you want to change something about yourself? If so, what could you do? Decide to change your actions if you want to change your results. Make a plan with achievable steps to your goal.
It’s solution time. You can accept the way you are without any more negative statements or you can endeavour to change whatever it is that brings about your comments. If you decide to make a few changes, start now to work toward those goals and have confidence in your ability to change.
- Your conversations will reveal you’re new, more positive outlook!
- This, in turn, will change the way you portray yourself, to friends and family.
Ignore The Gossip – Be True To Yourself.
Realize that people gossip no matter what, it is irresistible to some people and almost everyone has given in or will give in to gossip at one point or another.
The important thing lies in your reaction to it––let it bother you and it will hurt and potentially stunt your style.
On the other hand, if you realize how shallow and narrow-minded those gossiping are and that you are doing the right thing regardless of their gossip, you will stay strong in the face of gossip.
Make a choice to not worry and to get on with being yourself, knowing it’s not everyone who has the courage to do so. Portray yourself in your image, be true to yourself.
Become the person you want to be by refusing to say anything negative about yourself to others. Share positive experiences with zeal without overdoing it. Through what you say to others, you can re-shape what they (and you) think of you.
You’ll discover more happiness, experience more self-respect, and become more comfortable with the incredible person you are!